The Plan and The Why

So I wrote a metric shit-ton of super-short scripts for this here animated project I’m calling CrashToons. The idea being that I can write, edit and animate (if you call my crude drawings with even cruder “motion” animation) these shorts all solo-style.  We’ll see if that can happen.  The writing part is complete(ish) and now I’m staring at a mini-pile of scripts that I need to start thumb-nailing and will hopefully record the dialogue tracks for in the next two weeks or so.

 

CrashToons ain’t an entirely solo-style project since I suck balls at “acting.”  I’m planning on leaning pretty heavily on good ol’ Michael Dalmon (APESH!T’s Ralph, Fart Genie, Mr. Cripple, etc.) for his cornucopia of vocal skills.  I’m thinking he’ll be my own special-needs Mel Blanc.  Some of the scripts require some back and forth with another actor so I’m gonna reel in some more pallies when needed.  Maurice (APESH!T’s Albert) Ripke is on deck to kick some ass along side us.

 

Back to the pile of smashed up trees with words on them.  A few of the CrashToon ideas are revealing themselves to be episodic and others are gonna be one-offs.  The scripts so far, break down like this:

 

 

Limp Dictionary:

I have three completed Limp Dictionary scripts: “Lollygagging,” “RU-486,” and “Chow Down.” These lil’ dingle-berries are ripe and ready to go.  Limp D is an adventure into etymology.  So all you wordsmiths out there should be getting all wet with anticipation, yes?  Hopefully we’ll record the audio tracks in the next week or so. 

 

 

Platypus Rex:

I made some doodles for a platypus character and promptly dubbed him Platypus Rex (or P.Rex for short).  I’ve been accumulating a butt-load of first-person humor that I’m funneling into the platypus (like foie gras!).  In my mind, I was collecting this material for my looming stand-up comic career, but I lack the balls to set that ball in motion and have re-purposed the comedic black-gold into scripts for the bitter monotreme.  Rex will be a series voiced by Michael Dalmon. We have several super-short scripts for this stinky b-hole: “Hymenoplasty,” “Spanglish,” “E.D.,” “Rosemary’s Bastard,” “Half-Mile High Club,” “Star Anise,” “Long Arm of the Law,” “Mime Death,” “Ho,” “Conundrum,” and “Crop Circles.

 

Jackin’ the one-offs:

“Puppies vs. Kittens” is already storyboarded and the sound effects are in place.  We just need to record the freakin’ dialogue!  This one is likely to be the first CrashToon we finish.  It’s pretty short and simple and clocks in at around 48 seconds. 

“Fire Ants” is another one-off that is ready to record and animate.  We have a few more random chunks we’re preparing to blow: “Road Kill,” “FEMA Zombies,” “Bear Hands, ”Seeing Eye Dog,” “Prison Blues,” “Beer & Pussy,” “Peanut Head” and more.

 

Some of the uber-short scripts will be presented sorta like a short panel comic strip.  Hell, some might even just have a single shot with a sentence or two of dialogue.  Sorta like an animated Far Side comic or Ziggy (but funny) or the like.

 

Obviously there’s a lot to be done here.  And since the plan is to keep the cast & crew as small as possible, we’ll see how far we can get with all the hair-brained ideas.  I’d love to get four of these ‘toons completed before we launch the site.  April 20 would be a great launch date, but we’ll just have to see if the stars align to allow such nonsense.  In the mean time, I’ll keep y’all updated on this here blog, eh?

 

I hope y’all stick around for the ride! 
cheers,

-bob